You Must Shield Yourself From This… #27

Jun 30, 2020 | Personal Development, Special Needs

So many of us battle with anxiety often from various levels of worry and easily fall into the habit of worry without even knowing. It is easy to slip into the state of worry even when times aren’t so turbulent and when the world isn’t experiencing heightened anxiety and worry collectively. For sure, 2020 is certainly a year that has rocked our world and will produce dramatic changes that will shape our future in ways we have never expected. 

Recently I had to make some changes in my life to rebalance and center myself so I wouldn’t feel immobilized by all thoughts in my brain that were sabotaging my calm. I recognized that world energy for the most part is one of anxiety, stress, and discord. It’s so easy to become a part of that collective energy when it’s everyplace you go and effects everything you do. 

Here are some of the things I have done to help get myself back on track and little things that you can do to shield yourself from the excess that trickles into your life that isn’t serving you.

1. I limit my news intake. I was finding I was getting caught up into too much bad news coverage. I would even get sucked up into the news highlights on my cell phone. After reading the coverage, I would feel nothing but disturbed and mad at myself for wasting my time and energy. 

2. I had to reclaim my regular routine (for some reason I was thrown off.) Some of the most essential components to my day are my morning stretch and exercise, and my morning journal reflection. 

3. I made a worry list. I made a column that is headed My List and a column God’s List. I place each worry in the appropriate column. All of Lisa’s List are things that I can control and take action on. Anything else that I don’t have control over goes in a column headed God’s List. This gives me a better perspective on what is really essential and what is out of my control. Each time I do this I find most of what I worry about is out of my control and I can’t do anything about it. I give it up to God and trust he’s got my back. There is so much we really do not have control over in this world.  

4. I have been making a conscious effort to get outside in nature and be with nature. I’ve been rearranging my flower gardens.  

5. I have limited my social media. I find that it is so easy to get pulled into everyone else’s business. I need to preserve myself, my self-care and focus on what is best for me right now. 

Those are a few things that I do to reset, calm, and get the crazies out of my brain. But the most essential component is our family mantra, ‘Be here, NOW.” I think that says it all. If you can be wherever you are in that place complete and fully, in the present, your worries will vanish. It is the thoughts in your mind that are creating worry and anxiety. If you did not have any beliefs and lived in the present of time everything would be okay. There would be no worry. I know, that may seem strange to think about, right?  I love these activities that challenge me in this way. It is hard to just “Be here NOW,” especially in these times. But, imagine if we practice these concepts now, just think how much better off we’ll be past all of these challenges we face here in 2020. 

“Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.” Roy T. Bennett

Today I have a special guest and good friend, Michele Clock who emanates Bennett’s simple, but powerful wisdom. Michele is a part of my Woman to Woman series. I am featuring Michele this week because I am committed to representing all types of women, their journeys, talents, and passions. 

I met Michele years ago at a special needs conference where she was speaking. We both have children with special needs so she is a part of my local community and network. I chose to feature Michele for my series because she has a vibrant outlook, a zest for life, and I have never heard her express a worry. The unique thing about Michele is she is visually impaired.  

Lisa: Michele, tell us about you.

Michele: I was born with poor visual acuity, corrective lenses were always an option for me until a series of medical events over the past 15-20 years caused me to tolerate vision correction less and less. Over the years, I earned my M.S. at UNH in Communication and Sciences Disorders and have worked in both public and private schools as an ASHA certified Speech and Language Pathologist. I am most proud of being the mother to my beautiful, compassionate, 15-year-old daughter, who was born prematurely, resulting in a host of medical conditions, including Cerebral Palsy. There was a time that I had to transition from what I perceived as a comfortable and successful world to a world where my visual acuity was plagued by double vision and visual perceptual/processing challenges; to a world with a contracted visual field and eyes seeing 20/700 at best. That has been scary.

Lisa: How did you gracefully accept the challenge of the changes in your vision?

Michele: Don’t we all have challenges? I have come to realize that, it is how we choose to face these challenges, accept the hand that we are dealt, and live that makes the difference. For many years, I lived in fear, allowing myself to be a victim of perceived limitations and feeling a lack of support, not anymore. 

Lisa: What is the one thing that helped you transition successfully?

Michele: It was my daughter’s developmental ophthalmologist, taking me on as a patient 12 years ago, and after multiple attempts at vision therapy, including prisms and exercises, she recommended I reach out to Hadley for the Blind and Visually Impaired.

Lisa: How did Hadley change your life? 

Michele: It was a true gift. It was a journey of understanding and gratitude for me. I have always been a learner, but the opportunities I had at Hadley School for the Blind and Visually Impaired opened more doors for where I was right now. The courses and workshops have helped me to be independent again. I no longer live in fear. The classes I have taken have allowed me to find myself again and to better parent my daughter, which means the world to me. I am better able to advocate for myself and for my daughter. I have a tremendous community of friends and supports that I did not have prior to my acquaintance with Hadley. A supportive community is worth a lot. There is truly a gift in every situation in life you just have to look for it. 

Lisa: What is the one lesson you have learned through this personal journey? 

Michele: Controlling what I can and letting go of what I cannot control.

Lisa: If you could share one thing with women in my community what would it be?

Michele: Off the top of my head, there are a few, effective communication is essential, leaning on facts eases the worrying, and choose gratitude. 

Lisa: Do you feel judged by other people?

Michele: I use a white cane for mobility and safety. I cannot control what others think, I am in control of me. If someone asks me questions then I am happy to share about my journey, but I choose to move forward for myself and my own health and well being. I do not see myself as disabled, I just find a way that works for me like any other person navigating life. 

Lisa: Can you give us a glimpse of how you have to have adapted your life to give us more understanding? 

Michele: Try to imagine this….to overcome your fear… play a game of beep baseball, cook a meal blindfolded, ski down a mountain eyes closed using only a headset with auditory connections.

Lisa: Wow! That gives perspective. 

Lisa: What are you really good at?

Michele: Being positive, finding a way to make things work, not being limited by society, or a diagnosis. A diagnosis is just information or an explanation, not an excuse for either me or society. I have a mindset of no boundaries or limitations, to continue to learn and grow.

Lisa: I love that. As your friend, I see those things in you and that is why I wanted to interview you and share your story with my community. 

Lisa: Who inspires you most these days? 

Michele: I love Hadley Podcasts, Northeast Passage, Maine Adaptive sports, Aphasia Center of Maine,  Love Your Brain Yoga, Faces of TBI, a brain injury podcast I follow. 

Lisa: Tell us something about yourself that might surprise people.

Michele: I am a watercolor artist, Speech/Language Pathologist, Yoga Instructor, and a Parent Advocate-Parent Information Center, NH

Thank you so much, Michele, for your time and energy. You are definitely an inspiration and a talented woman who has gone from worry to being a powerful creator.

I hope this series has been useful and inspiring for you all. 

I am Lisa Jollimois. I am a personal development coach for women who want to transform their lives. If you need more support getting through this current crisis, contact me. Or if you need support naturally maintaining your weight, rewriting your story, exploring new possibilities for an empty nest, or feeling stuck. I can help act as a guide to get your life into action.

If this interests you or if you want to level-up your standard of life despite our current circumstances email me for your FREE discovery call at lisa@lisajollimois.com or sign up at   https://calendly.com/lisa-365

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Big Hugs,

Unmasked… “Life With Special Abilities” #11

Oct 17, 2019 | Personal Development, Special Needs

We’ve all worn masks. I think I’ve worn the one with the gold and red ribbon in the center of the picture.

There have been times in my life where I have wondered what the heck am I gonna do next. That’s been my time of being a part of the masquerade.

Have you ever been in the place where you wonder what the next step is?

Trust me, I’ve been there…

It is those times when you have felt paralyzed and have thought there has to be more to life, but you find it difficult to know what direction to take. Maybe you’ve seen yourself fail or the unexpected has happened that flips your world upside down.

Let me tell you more about one of those world-rocking times… Seventeen years ago my fourth child was born with Down Syndrome.

I can remember standing in my living room, feeling alone and being afraid. I knew nothing about Trisomy 21, children who were born with an extra chromosome on the 21st pair or Down Syndrome.

Sure, It was hard those first few months after Patrick was born. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t hard having Patrick. I loved and treated him like my other children… as a capable human being despite some of the things I had read or was told about Trisomy 21. The difficulty was seeing pitied faces and hearing the limiting beliefs people had of Down Syndrome.

The great thing was we often proved those beliefs wrong. I learned fast that conscious awareness was the best way to grow this child, any child and listening to those beliefs wasn’t worth a dime.

I was told Patrick couldn’t nurse. With perseverance, commitment, and support Patrick eventually latched on and nursed exclusively. There were many of those moments. It became clear to me that Patrick was here in his perfect form, the one that God intended for him…And what a gift!

This month is National Down Syndrome Awareness month. Patrick is 17 years old. Today, I stand in my living room with a full heart and eyes that see through a different lens. I count the many gifts he has brought to me. A trait that comes to mind as our Halloween nears is that Patrick is Patrick. He doesn’t wear a mask, or hide himself. He is who he is wholeheartedly. He doesn’t think twice about who he is or what others think of him.

So many of us put on that mask and present ourselves the way we want to be seen, the way we think society expects us to be. With that, we rob ourselves of our authenticity, our true self, our gifts and talents. We prevent ourselves from making genuine connections that enrich our lives.

We can either wear the mask that hides us or remove it all together to expose our real self. It is clear that one path leads you to the land of pretend and disconnection, the other towards a beautiful life experience full of love, connectedness and joy.

The good thing is that we all have a choice here.

So, the next time when you feel the constriction of wondering what people are thinking… pull off the mask and be you. Take the risk. I know now that when people show up and be vulnerable it not only changes the lives of those around them, but it has the ability to ripple and change the world.

I am Lisa Jollimois, mother of four who loves supporting women 40 plus who are looking for a more fulfilling life. I work with women who want to take the mask off, uncover themselves, take the next step, rewrite their story, be more vulnerable, and learn how to live happier, healthier, confident and radiant.

If this interests you, email me for your FREE Discovery call at lisa@lisajollimois.com or sign up at https://calendly.com/lisa-365

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Big Hugs,